The Culture of Football and Why You Don't Insult our Game

If you ever felt so inspired as to read my profile, you can see that I have a background in Anthropology. What this actually means is that I have a degree that is fairly useless for employment, but it does help me to evaluate certain situations differently. When I travel, I can help subside culture shock, but attempting to look at things through a cultural lens; it’s the social scientist approach to life. Last year, while in Guatemala, I was driven crazy by a woman who constantly compared everything to Canada.
“Oh my goodness…look at that…we don’t have that in Canada.”
“Look at the poverty! We don’t have that kind of poverty in Canada.”
“Look at the children! Our children our so much better off in Canada.”
“Oh look at the school…our schools are so much better in Canada.”
“F*ck Canada.” (did I say that?!?!)
Finally, driven to the brink of frustration, I finally had a bit of a falling out with her after an argument over the situation on our northern Reserves. Afterwards, I did my best to avoid her (mainly because I did not want to act on my desire to slap some sense into her). My feeling is – if you want to travel, you have to be prepared for the fact that things will be different, and that you can’t evaluate “them” based on “us” (yes, you might know this mentality under the formal name of the us-them dichotomy). Casting judgements leads to ethnocentrism. Instead, we need to look at different cultures through the realm of cultural relativism (pardon the anthropological terms…I studied anthropology for a long time; using three anthropological terms in the course of this blog posting makes me feel somewhat better about my education).

While teaching in London, I was initially struck by how different things were. I would not say that I had culture shock – believe me, after the amount of time I spent in New Orleans, London is far from a culture shock! The toughest thing I experienced in London was adapting to an urban setting; traffic without trees. It cannot be denied that students are challenging – especially compared to what we are used to in Thunder Bay. In order to understand it, you must take a cultural approach – there is more at stake than what is simply seen on the surface. London, being the melting pot that it has become, experiences a vast array of cultural influences. So you must remember; every culture evaluates structured education differently; as such, these differences play out in the classroom.

That’s not the point though…football (European not American) is my point. Recently I was told by a Brit, that hockey fights are staged for the audience. They are nothing more than scripted fights as those witnessed in the WWF. Of course, being a Canadian, and a fan of hockey (and admittedly someone who enjoys a good hockey throw-down), I defended our national pastime (not to be confused with our national sport, which is actually lacross). Come on – what does a Brit know about hockey??? K…so that p*ssed me off a bit, and I’m still bitter.

When I began this whole British experience nearly a year ago, I decided that I would learn about their pastime – football (which I still referred to as "soccer"). This was mainly because I find that male students are easier to deal with when you can engage them in sports talk. I was also perplexed by soccer mentality. It is a scary, scary world! While we North Americans are avid followers of our sports leagues (NHL, NFL, NBA, etc), we tend not to bleed for our sports. Though I do recall a drunken night, during the Lewis-Tysen fight, that a friend (who was a Lewis fan) decided to brawl with a Tyson fan - luckily vodka and the crowded bar made this nothing more than a talked about idea (but don't think that our cab driver wasn't amused by my friend's drunken rage)- but that isn't the norm...European football fans are a whole other story!! It is life or death. No…I’m wrong…Bill Shankly once claimed that "some people think football is a matter of life and death. I assure you, it’s much more serious than that. " And it is.

I am not sure there has been such a violent sport in recent history – and no…not out on the field, but between the fans. The same person who insulted hockey has also attempted to educate me on football. Unfortunately, he being a Liverpool fan, and me being me (meaning I like to prod the bull), I quickly learned that the fastest way to p*ss off a Liverpool fan is to cheer for Manchester United. Insult hockey, and I will find a way to retaliate.

I am a foreigner who was not brought up in the ways of football, and as such, I will never truly understand it. So here is what I know about football (in a nutshell). I know some of the top names now (unfortunately the majority of these names are associated with, or have been associated with Liverpool, so I can’t say that I have had the most unbiased education), I know the standings, and the difference between the Championship League and Premier League, and some of the basic rules. But the sport itself is of little interest to me. Watching guys running up and down a field, while kicking a black and white ball is a tad bit redundant (when the score is 2-0 with 20 minutes remaining, and the commentators can predict a victory, that is a little bit…boring…) – but the fans – that’s where the true action is. So here is what else I know: if you are a true fan, you must be prepared to bleed for your team. You wear your colours proudly, and when enemies stray into your territory wearing their colours, you must be prepared to kick the cr*p out of them. If you are caught in enemy territory, you must be prepared to defend your team diligently. Life or death and so much more. We as Canadians tend not identify ourselves based on our team affiliation – football fans do. That’s commitment.


I now leave you with quotes and links that best show footballer mentality.

“I know this is a sad occasion but I think that Dixie would be amazed to know that even in death he could draw a bigger crowd than Everton can on a Saturday afternoon.” (Bill Shankly at Dixie Dean’s funeral)

“The rules of soccer are very simple, basically it is this: if it moves, kick it. If it doesn't move, kick it until it does” Phil Woosnam

“I loathed the game, and since I could see no pleasure or usefulness in it, it was very difficult for me to show courage at it. Football, it seemed to me, is not really played for the pleasure of kicking a ball about, but is a species of fighting.” George Orwell

“I'm sure sex wouldn't be so rewarding as this World Cup. It's not that sex isn't good but the World Cup is every four years and sex is not.” Ronaldo

“In Latin America the border between soccer and politics is vague. There is a long list of governments that have fallen or been overthrown after the defeat of the national team” Luis Suarez

“If this can be termed the century of the common man, then soccer, of all sports, is surely his game.... In a world haunted by the hydrogen and napalm bomb, the football field is a place where sanity and hope are still left unmolested” Stanley Rous

http://vault.sportsillustrated.cnn.com/vault/article/magazine/MAG1068307/index.htm
http://english.peopledaily.com.cn/200505/30/eng20050530_187490.html
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/3130124.stm
As I find better links I will update :-p

Rerecruitment and Sexing a Thesis

I am presently praying that I am hired by an agency that I was interviewed by last week. It is sort of my dream agency. After having spent time with two other agencies, and having researched countless others, I have developed a fairly decent “bullsh*t” detector. This new agency is run by a recruiter who has not only taught in London, but did so for three years! I have become accustomed to the generic answers that recruiters give – and let me tell you, it can be highly frustrating. Promise are made, and my “best interests are always at heart”. This recruiter has impressed me because she doesn’t give the “everything is merry in England” answers. She knows that I know that this isn’t the case. So I am praying – I want to get back to England before I become too comfortable at home (and it is starting!). I also want to get back to work. I’m bored. No, not really bored…just missing money. I also miss acting like a grown up everyday. When I went to work in London I felt like I was playing dress up – let’s face it, I don’t dress professionally in Thunder Bay. In London I got to play with clothes and scarves (the art of pashmina)…oh…and heels. I’m not sure that it’s a good thing that at 28 I still see getting “dressed up for work” as playing grown up, but whatever works, right?

In the mean time this new agency has introduced me to teachers.tv and I am completely addicted. I am particularly addicted to “Teaching with Bayley”. John Bayley is an education consultant who was ranked as outstanding by OFSTED (and has nothing to do with Iris Murdoch as far as I know!); and let me tell you, I am pretty impressed. After having more insight into the world of British classrooms by way of these programs, I am feeling a bit more at ease. The recruiter told me that if I watch one of these videos daily, I will be a far better teacher for it – I’m watching a lot more than one on a daily basis, because I am hooked! Along with the Bayley videos are countless others, dealing in a full range of topics (thankfully behaviour management as well!). teachers.tv also has a full section for NQTs (which technically I am not an NQT to UK standards, but I am in Canadian standards – don’t worry, I understand what I am trying to say!)…anyway, all I am saying is that teachers.tv is a good resource. Especially during moments of procrastination and lately there have been plenty of those moments.

Oh yeah, and I’m still dealing with my thesis. He (because my thesis is now an individual) and I still don’t really like one another. In a month I have only successfully completed a partial rewrite of the chapter that I previously written. Progress is slow and interest is waning. I still love bison, and I love studying bones – it is writing about either topic that is a problem for me. Every time I sit down to write, I feel like I’ve been condemned to prison. Unfortunately I cannot apply to the University of Liverpool until I am finished my sentence.

All I know is that my thesis is coming to England with me – yay, more luggage. I also know that when I do go back to overseas, its going to be a very fast return – none of this booking a ticket two months in advance crap – nope, I know what to do when I get there now. I have experience (who’d of thought?). Hoping this agency likes me (please!), I sort of know when I’m heading back over, and truth be told, I can’t wait!!!!!!

London Continually Lost

It is October 31, and normally I would be excited. I love Halloween! If I were home right now, I would likely be going out for my friend’s pre-birthday celebration. She is amazing when it comes to making costumes; most people slap together a costume in the last week. My friend on the other hand, knows months in advance what she is going to “be” for Halloween. And her costumes reflect her careful attention to detail. Today I would be perfectly happy to be someone else.

I’m actually a bit relieved to be in a city that celebrates the occasion. Since I arrived in London, I have seen people dressed up in costumes – or else they were just outwardly eccentric. I still appreciate the man, dressed in a white suit, covered in black arrows; he was “Northwest”. (yes, as in the direction.). Clever. Several years ago my friends and I purposely headed to Amsterdam for Halloween, thinking that it would be a hotbed of entertainment. Unfortunately, as it turned out, Halloween in Amsterdam was relatively dull. After spending an evening in a local “coffeehouse”, we continued our celebration to a square in the center of town. We were disappointed, but we somehow managed to numb our pain. Maybe I need to go back to Amsterdam?

Today it occurred to me that I am dangerously close to my first month in London. Six days away, in fact. I decided to go to Carshalton and find the school that I will be teaching at next week. It was a 50 minute round trip venture, but I have to admit, that I was pretty impressed with the town/suburb/whatever. It was quiet (and I was there in the middle of the afternoon), and had…wait for it….TREES!! I had lunch, and I didn’t spend a fortune. It was overwhelming, life changing, earth shattering (I have tapped into my sarcasm). If I didn’t think that I would go stir crazy, I would actually move there. This is not the point though.

On my commute, I was forced to reflect on the past near-month. That’s what us teachers do, right? Reflect, reflect, reflect. We reflect on the good and bad, and see where we can improve. We write about our reflections, modify our styles, re-reflect, modify, and eventually find something that works for us; once it works we reflect again and find out that it needs more modification . Here is my reflection:

In the past 3.5 weeks, I have successfully:
1. Learned to cross a street with traffic coming at me from the wrong direction; related to this I have also learned to dodge traffic, jaywalk, and dash across busy intersections.
2. Only had one bus/coach honk at me for maybe waiting too long to cross…
3. Gotten the nerve up to cross the Vauxhaul Bridge, venture into an unknown area, and find London’s greatest sights; all within spitting distance of my hotel. That’s a big accomplishment for a girl from a small town.
4. Gotten the nerve to venture into the unknown after dark.
5. Gotten hired & fired all within 3 hours (and I’m still bitter about that).
6. Learned how to use an Oyster Card.
7. Ventured out of London, because I can recognize I need to find my sanity.
8. Made it through a full day without crying – that was yesterday.
9. Made through 2 full days without calling home.
10. Learned to be demanding when the situation calls for it; and to scowl at the a**hole who cuts me off on the sidewalk.
11. Gotten hives, and finally identified the source of the hives.
12. Come to terms with that fact that I have to let go of the comforts that I appreciate; doesn’t mean I like it, just means I have to accept it.
13. Found my addiction to the X Factor; Go Diana! (oh and Simon is less popular here than in America)
14. Learned the importance and necessity of having someone who can take some of the pain away. Whether it is 6000 miles or 10 miles, there is a difference between being independent and being reclusive.
15. Learned to ignore the daily reports of shootings and robberies. It’s life.
16. Accepted that I need to let go of what I know because I know absolutely nothing here.
17. Accepted that I periodically screw up so badly that it can’t be fixed overnight. Apparently problems can’t be fixed in half an hour, like on television?
18. Traded in terms like soccer, bus, silly, check mark and parking lot for words like football, coach, daft, tick, and car park. When in Rome (errrrr…London)….
19. Discovered London shopping…risky!
20. Slept for 12 straight hours (granted that was in Leeds, and now that I’m back in London, I’m back to not sleeping!)
21. Learned to interpret the tariffs on my mobile phone.

And what I still need to do:
1. Learn what a tariff actually is.
2. Accept that I need to move into more affordable accommodations.
3. Accept that I can’t always control the outcome.
4. Let go of more, and stop looking for the parallels.
5. Get through a second day without crying.
6. Stop second guessing, over analyzing, and thinking.
7. Learn how to sleep.
8. Stop praying that this will be over soon, and learn to love it.
9. Classroom management – London students aren’t the same as Ontario students.
9.5 Behaviour management – ya, the same as above.
10. Learn to take it one day at a time, not one year at a time.
11. Learn to keep the stiff upper lip of the Brits.

12. Learn that if I leave my umbrella at home, it will definitely rain.
13. Find all of the answers to the questions that are driving me up the bloody wall.

I’ve already outlasted Banbury. And to be honest – for as horrible as I have felt in London, I still feel better than I did when I was in Banbury. Maybe I can make this work? One day at a time…